Do The ‘Linga’

As Chris and I are wont to do in the sex writing game we are in, I was sent a few toys from a shop that wanted me to review their wares. The place,, sent over a pink Hitachi Wand and what they call their “Linga: Pulse Wave Lasting Training Device” (see the pictures above).

The Hitachi is pretty much the device we all know, a ‘wand’-like long massager with the bulbous head. I’ve always considered this mostly a lady’s vibrator. It’s been my experience (only in what I have heard of course…wink wink) that a Hitachi’s powerful punch makes is as much a favorite with some women as something others like to keep their nether parts far away from.

Admittedly, when it comes to any adult toy, it’s always a matter of individual preference over likes and dislikes.

The Linga, though, is quite an unusual animal. From what I was able to determine (again only from the most cursory of research, I am careful where I place myself these days) the thing which is, as you see, not more than an 8-inches long (please don’t ask me how I measured it!), has a flap opening on its underside, is made of durable, hypoallergenic plastic, and is ribbed in the area where one…well…’puts’ oneself. The Linga’s other side is made of harder plastic, and sports on/off vibration-changing button (there are five different patterns here).

The whole thing is powered, as lots of toys are these days, by a USB cord.

I’m not sure how much ‘training’ one could manage with this. The Linga’s vibrations are quite unnerving and robust (and the device very loud). I’m not saying it’s not effective, it damn well is, but like an Hitachi, this is a sex toy that one will either take too immediately or not take to at all. One could even enjoy the vibrator without placing one’s penis into it (or so I imagine) as holding the Linga against a body part will always produce some highly rhythmic responses.

I’m not shelling for here. I am sure they are nice people, and their stuff I see is well made. I was sent these items and felt, why not give forth on a little review for us all here at Licking Non-Vanilla, get past the usual podcast pontification I usually make you suffer through and show you what we sex writers get up to lots of the time.

Keep listening…maybe you’ll hear the thrumming of my Linga in the far distance.

As always, you can find our podcast here.

Get Your LVN Swag

Come one, come all, down to the Tee Public Licking Non-Vanilla store (go here). You can order t-shirts, mugs, stickers and so much more with our open mouth, drippy lips logo and the name of our sexy podcast. As you see from the picture here (that’s our first-ever guest Miss Ava of showing off her assets for the cause….we thank her so much!), the swag we have is oh-so-sexy and oh-so-ready for you to snatch up and wear, use, display as you wish.

There is a tendency these days to splash one’s endeavors far and wide across that great Interweb thingie all the kids are ‘on.’ But one needs tread lightly with making sure what one posts, tweets, and certainly sells, is substantive…or at least this is the way all of us at Licking Non-Vanilla view our responsibility to our brand/product/name. This is why, we partnered with Tee Public, knowing that the items they produce and the manner in which they get the orders out is professional and the best it could be.

(I actually met the people of the New Jersey-based company at a NYC Comic Con and was as blown away by the display of their product as how enthusiastic the crew manning their table was when talking to anyone coming by). The way I figured it, if Tee Public is good enough for Kevin Smith to sell his stuff on, they’d be good enough for me.

I’m sure we will get other designs up into the store. But for right now we are offering our swag printed with, what we hope will become, our infamous logo. As you instantly know you’re in for a nice cool sweet sip when you see that Coca-Cola design and colors, we hope you will feel the same when you see and hopefully come to wear a LNV shirt or take a sip of coffee from one of our mugs. You are always sure to get a nice cool sweet sip of Chris and I imparting something naughty, fun and maybe even silly with Licking Non-Vanilla.

Once again, the Licking Non-Vanilla Tee Public store is here.

And you can find Miss Ava here.

Episode #9: We Talk To Bridget at

The new episode of Licking Non-Vanilla is up, and on it, Chris and I talk to Bridget from
Chris and I ‘met’ Bridget writing articles for her site. Although a great big depository of porn films, H.M. also has an extensive “Spotlight” area where they feature interviews with adult stars, movie reviews, ‘Best Of,” listings, and the “Updated,” pieces Chris and I (and plenty of other excellent writers) contribute.
Having developed a solid working relationship with Bridget, although neither of us had ever spoken with her, Chris, and I, thought it would be fun to have her on.

We just didn’t know how much fun!

We learned a little bit about Bridget’s background, “how a nice girl like you” landed at What exactly the website has and does. What Bridget looks for as an editor (this perspective is especially interesting we feel to all the writers out there, no matter what it is one might be writing) and we learned about all the new technology has that makes searching the massive site such a pleasure for the casual fan and porn connoisseur alike. Their MovieMaker Playlist section is terrific, and Bridget even talked to us about the latest in facial recognition software.
When it comes to porn and the net, the sky is the limit.
I know you think you know all there is to know about naughty films, where to get them and how to find the particular scenes, stars, and action you like. Whatever you enjoy, has it. Whatever you may not have found at other places, a search across will bring you to your particular promised land. Even those titles, scenes, and stars you have only ever heard or fantasized about are at
Chris and I can’t thank Bridget enough, as much for her continued support of our writing work, coming onto the podcast to give us her time and her tireless efforts keeping us all warm and happy, making sure chugs along as well as it always did.
Thank you, Bridget.
And thank you for listening to us interview Bridget.

Speaking To Sweet Octavia Hunter

I don’t know what to say about our magnificent guest of episode # 8, but Octavia Hunter is tops in our little black book! I was introduced to the lady about a year ago but knew of her from way back. As much from her “Little Cinderella,” porn star name (or “Linda Cinderella,” a joke you will quickly understand from this episode), and her iconic turn in the movie Boogie Nights. Octavia is the one you see getting out of the limo near the beginning of the movie, at the pool party scene, with “The Colonel.” She has a famous OD-ing scene a few scenes later.

As you will hear from the episode, Octavia told us about meeting both Burt Reynolds, on the BN set, and later Jane Fonda on another movie, as well as regaling us about her life and times in porn in the 90s. But most importantly, we talked about female-empowerment, sex-positivity, and all that Octavia will be doing in the near future when her website is complete (you can go there now just to take a peek of what she has up so far at: and her memoir when it’s published next year.

What a super cool lady, Chris and I just had to keep her with us for the whole episode.

What we are trying to give you with Licking Non-Vanilla is impromptu guest-appearance shows as well as those one-on-one’s with just Chris and I, living the ‘variety is the spice of life,’ ethos to the max.

We do so hope you are enjoying what you are hearing. If you are or even if you aren’t, feel free to send us an email at We really would love to hear from you.

In the meantime, enjoy Octavia. She was a fantastic guest, and we love her!

For Your Naughty Viewing Pleasure: Neil from Clips4Sale

undefinedFor Chris and my second-ever call-in guest, we were honored to speak to Neil, owner of Clips4Sale (that episode of Licking Non-Vanilla is up now). If you have never traipsed across the C4S website, I suggest you do so now. Go here. Go ahead, I’ll wait….

Yes, there is lots of stuff on Neil’s site! Celebrating its17th year, Clips4Sale boasts over 7 million available clips, showcasing over 1,000 fetishes from over 50,000 content producers. It’s unprecedented incredibly high traffic volume sees over 1.3 million daily page views and 20 million fetish-hungry visitors each month.

(Sure, go back to it after you’re done reading this blog, see if you ever come up for air!)

What I really like about Neil, something you are sure to find when listening to Chris and I jaw with the guy, is that he is so open and honest, so welcoming to anybody who wants to contact him (he displays his personal phone number on the site for anybody who wants to call in with a question or a comment). Neil is simply an honest guy wanting to give people what they are looking for and connect creators to their audiences. Clips4Sale consistently presents a product that is not only saleable, but all that folks hope to find when taking their libidos out searching across the net.

As he says:

“Clips4Sale is for everyone. We do not cater to a single group or focus only on certain things. It’s for all people to use and all people to be a part of.” 

Chris and I so want to thank Neil for his time and for making this episode of Licking Non-Vanilla so wonderful.

Images4Sale, Videos4Sale, and streaming video membership site C4SLive are also part of the Clips4Sale online multi-media entertainment experience. For more information about Clips4Sale, check the site as I mention above @ or follow Twitter at @clips4sale and @cs4updates.undefined

Making The 40 Best Sex Podcast 2020 List

Licking Non-Vanilla just made this top podcast list: How wonderful! Chris and I are so very flattered!

Titled, The 40 Best Sex Podcasts that are Candid, Explicit, Titillating, Erotic, Mostly Hilarious, and Sometimes Very Strange Domina Doll over at the site, placed our hour of unexpurgated talk at #12 among the 40 she listed. We want to say thank you and compliment DD on her obviously superb taste.

As Domina lets us know, over 200 podcasts are dealing with “sex, relationships, and erotica,” so she managed the research for us all with this comprehensive list. She also promised that in the weeks ahead sexpert will review lots of these specific shows their: “Best Sex Podcasts 2020 Weekly Digest.” That digest will be brought to readers by Tickle.Life Podcasts, which supports a wide array of amazing #sexpositive adult podcasts!

As mentioned on our show as well as on here, Chris and I are aware that there are tons of places to listen to sexy talk online (although we had no idea we were among 200+). This is why we are so thrilled when people sign-up to Licking Non-Vanilla or, at the very least, give us a listen. With so many choices out there, it is wonderful to be recognized on a top 40 list or by someone stopping by. 

Chris and I don’t consider ourselves competing against all those others shows, as we feel we are part of a big network of people delivering sex-positive talk, something that’s so needed as the world gets ever more complicated. The podcasts Domina Doll indicates are giving forth on a global scale, so there is plenty of listeners ‘out there,’ coming from all walks of life, so many varied experiences and listening in from their homes or during their daily lives from so many corners of the planet.

 We are honored to be among the many serving listeners our specific brand of naughty fun.

How To Write Porn For Fun And Profit: Episode #6

Episode #6 of our super sexy LNV podcast is ‘up’ starting today. On this segment of the show, Chris and I take a deep dive into what it means to be an erotica writer. Beyond the fantasy of imaging oneself, the author of erotic culture phenomena like Fifty Shades of Grey, we explore the meet-and-‘taters reality of writing fiction and non-fiction of a sex-positive, naughty nature.

Chris and I have been at the game a while (check out my twice-monthly column on sex writing here and Chris teaching a course on writing, at the As You Like it store in Eugene, OR, go here.) We have surfed (to keep with the water metaphor) plenty of choppy waters where the business of publishing is concerned (mostly dealing with Amazon) and the sometimes soul-numbing days of the writing life. This episode, as well as our usual approach, is not ‘oh-woe-is-me,’ but we do tell the truth; writing professionally is a job. But what we expound upon in episode six of Licking Non-Vanilla, is something we have always said: This writing job is no different than any other job.

This is where we feel we can mine the true common ground for all of you listening. Sure, you might come to us to learn some tools of the trade of sex writing; we hope we can lead you right or inspire you, at the very least. You might spin round our dial (wow, if that turn of phrase doesn’t stamp me an old geezer I don’t know what will!) just for some entertainment; at the very least, we always hope to entertain. Or maybe you come to LNV to take a much-deserved breath and realize, ‘Hey, there are a couple of knuckleheads out there just like me. Even though this M. Christian dude and this Ralph Greco, Jr. guy are sex writers, they seem to be dealing with the same daily crapola over their job that I do’; we hope we can provide that feeling of kinship with you.

Anyway, as always, we thank you for listening and hope our episode #6, as all of our episodes, warms the cockles of your heart…cause, what he hell good is anything unless you are walking around with warm cockles?

Licking Non-Vanilla Now on iTunes & iHeart

You know how they say a restaurant’s healthy business potential is based on “location, location, location?” Well, when it comes to the podcast game, it’s about ‘listeners, listeners, listeners.’ Beyond delivering a sexy and interesting show, as Chris and I are trying to do with Licking Non-Vanilla, one needs to get the podcast played on as many different networks and platforms as possible. This week, from the tireless efforts of our producers, we can now be heard ‘on’ both the iHeartRadio Network as well as iTunes.

And we couldn’t be happier.

We also received this wonderful forward of a press release that landed on the adult business site XBIZ, at this UK radio site. When it comes to spreading the news about our naughty broadcast, we appreciate any mention, as we so appreciate all the new subscribers that are coming our way. It’s all about getting the word around, to make even the smallest of squeaky noise out there among all the other podcast programming you could be listening to.

Chris and I are well aware of how many podcasts there are out there. And when it comes to the world of sexy, sassy ‘conversatin’, there are lots of eargasmic places to tickle your brain across. Being heard or even noticed in the din is not easy, but as we slither onward and upward, our goal is to keep delivering sex-positive stuff, unlike any you might hear anywhere else. We have plans to include a bunch of guests for future call-ins, will cover all those kinky subjects and interesting cultural news items sure to come our way and will surf, with you, these more than stifling COVID NO FUN social times we are currently surfing.

If you happen to have found us for the first time while reading this blog or have been grinding on us since the beginning of the ride, please feel free to say hi here and tell us how you found us. We’d sure like to know what platforms are bearing fruit.

Stay Safe, everybody!

First Five Episodes Of Licking Non-Vanilla Now Live

Good old Reiny Marco is cruising along, getting our naughty podcasts up. As of this writing, our first 5 episodes are available and can be accessed by flipping to the episode section of this site or going to our Youtube page to hear us. (There’s lots of other spots to hear the show as well, these are just a few).

Let me give you a little run down of what the shows are about.

Episode 1, our first, is where Chris and I introduce one another, how we met, and what we do. As we say from this show, and will forever claim, Licking Non-Vanilla is for adults looking to listen to some good honest jawing about that which lots of people like to enjoy, talk, consider, and fantasize about…sex. Of course, listeners to this kind of a podcast need be 18 and over, please.

In Episode 2, Chris and I debate, discuss and decipher just what is erotic and just what is porn? You’ll find at the end of the hour we have lots more questions about this essential quandary than we do answers.

We teach in Episode 3 how to become a sex writer. Follow our exact, easy-to-repeat instructions, and you are sure to be soon making millions in the field, pen a series as popular as Fifty Shades of Grey and win accolades and lingerie from those you so want to attract. Actually, we give forth on what it’s like to be ‘noble hacks,’ demystifying the whole shebang.

As you all must be aware, technology is intruding on every facet of modern life. In Episode 4, we tip into this discussion of where we are presently and where we might be headed in our digital age, especially how it stains our naughty interaction. Beware Disney + and George Lucas; we are coming for you.

We enjoy our first-ever call-in guest on Episode 5, the wonderful Ava Durga of, and A beautiful positive soul, sexy to a fault, and an empowering presence to all the men who come to her for her unique kind of attending and caring, we learn so much from Ava in this episode…and the state of sexy panties.

So, that’s where we are kids. Give a listen, subscribe, enjoy, tell the world. But mostly, enjoy Licking Non-Vanilla.



Where Ralphie Put Himself This Week

Ok, time to brag about my sex writing. (And when Chris get stuff done or a piece ‘up’ someplace online, rest assured I’ll be bragging about him as well). This week I have three articles that ‘went live,’ and in the spirit of forever loving to hear myself talk, I figured I’d blog about them. 

In no particular order…

At the wonderful Sexpert blog, run by the equally wonderful Domina Doll, another installment of my smut writing series premiered this week (see here). I contribute two articles monthly to this website that is jam-packed with a wide variety of sex-positive goodies. Chris writes for Domina too…in fact, there is something new happening for him, and on Sexpert, I just remembered (creeping old age really does take its toll on the old memory). Chris and Domina are running a free audiobook giveaway of one of Chris’s more spectacular works—although all of his work is spectacular—his hardware cyberpunk sex adventure short story collection called Hard Drive: The Best Sci-Fi Erotica of M. Christian, published by Wordwooze Publishing (a publisher both Chris and I have published plenty with).

Over at my long-running column on both shortandsweet sites (L.A. and NYC), I logged in another “SEX FILES.” This one addresses all the stuff people seem to be getting into during the COVID-19 lock-away. Have a look-see here.

Lastly, at one of the premier naughty movie sites, Hot, another one of my articles went live this week. What’s especially fun about the writing you will find over at H.M.’s “Spotlight” blog (and not just my stuff) is that they as run reviews of the thousands of movies listed on the site, plus interviews with adult stars, but also articles about all the different aspects of human sexuality. You can find my piece here, but look around, there are a few more from me offered and other great ones as I mention (and yes, Chris writes for them too).

Yes, I am rather proud of all I do, and just figured that if you are stopping by to listen in on Licking Non-Vanilla these days or reading this blog, why not turn you on as much to my other scribblings as all the great places I scribble across.