Where Does A Girl Go To Hide A Gun?

What do they say: truth is stranger than fiction? (actually, the quote I am taking from is by Mark Twain, when he wrote in Following the Equator: A Journey Around the World, “Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn’t.”) But this odd piece of news, reported this week, is something even the erasable Mr. Twain couldn’t have thought up:

Thirty-nine-year-old Amy Wilhite admitted to smuggling a loaded gun into Missouri’s Boone County jail when she entered the detention area on drug charges. Where did she smuggle the weapon? Yup, in her who-ha, special place, the seat of her golden triangle…her fucking vagina!

When the gun was found in her cell, Wilhite pleaded guilty to the felony indictment of “delivery or concealment” of the small (shit, lets’ hope it was small!) loaded 22. When the Columbia Police Department initially searched the lady, the officers failed to locate the 4.6-ounce revolver she had ‘stashed.’ This “pat search” was followed by a strip search, which also failed to detect that Amy was so uniquely loaded (um, come on officers, isn’t this what you get paid to find?). It was only after two and half weeks that the jailers discovered the gun, wrapped in plastic among Amy’s other possessions. 

Investigators claim that Amy had “removed the firearm from her body and concealed it within her personal belongings.” If she hadn’t removed it, would it ever have been found? Might it have gone off?

Wilhite admitted to possessing the gun, but only because she was “holding it for another female detainee.”

Wilhite also pleaded guilty to felony drug and weapons charges, of which she was initially arrested. She could serve five years on each of those convictions. The concealed gun charge won’t be helping her much. But a friend has got to do what they can for a friend, right?

Even when Chris and I feel we have tackled a good amount of nutty, fun, sexy news on our show (which you can tap into here, here, and here), there really is still so much happening in the world that will always surprise us, which is a good thing, really.

Careful where you hide your firearms, kiddies.

Oh yeah, regarding the picture that accompanies this blog. It’s from the opening of the late 50’s-early-60’s TV show THE RIFLEMAN starring Chuck Connors and a teenaged Johnny Crawford. Crawford, who won an emmy in 1959 for portraying Conner’s son in the series, died this week. For guys raised on, and loving genre TV, Chris and I certainly wanted to acknowledge the actor.

Published by lickingnonvanilla

Licking Non-Vanilla is a podcast and blog about kink, sexual mores and writing dirty words. Grab a cup of hot cocoa, pull up your favorite easy chair and sail into the dark, sweet waters of all things naughty... on Licking Non-Vanilla, with your hosts Ralph Greco, Jr. and M.Christian.

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